Every shot is beautifully composed in this short and steady tale about a nun and her aunt.
Girl joins twee cult that are into preventing suicide, tap dancing and blue eyed boys. Then they chat a bit. Incredibly watchable.
A film mainly about everything other than christmas. Retains the ‘Happy’ though, for the most part. Good chubby baby.
Pixar are best when being emotive and a film about feelings gives them plenty to play with. A fun feel bad movie.
A funny, bleak and beautifully shot Russian satire based on the retelling of the book of Job. Very cold, very corrupt and very large amounts of vodka.
Intent of destroying any happiness Fury starts off brilliantly raw. Loses it’s way at the end when it becomes a sob story/look how many SS we can kill with our limited ammo.
A very grey and creepy Australian haunted house horror full with tension and scary child acting. Largely a film about grief.
A humorously weird attack on Hollywood that doesn’t really make sense but in a very watchable way.
An intimate yet monumental coming-of-age film about a boy growing up and his life experiences. Took about as long to make as this drawing did, and it’s just as excellent as it too.
A beautiful but very cold film about self-awakening, the cold and something. A couple of excellent unnerving scenes and a very uncomfortable soundtrack.
COLD IN JULY
An 80s inspired thriller with enough twists and characters to keep things moving. Although it feels a little like cycling a hopper with a flat tyre. I’ve never been on a hopper.
EDGE OF TOMORROW
Groundhog Day goes sci-fi, keeps a little of the humour, adds a little bit of violence, kills off Cruise a lot. Quite good fun.
Tom Hardy in a car talking about concrete and “doing the right thing”. For some reason it’s brilliant.
A quintessentially Wes Anderson film full of colour, humour and people who would use the word quintessentially in every-day conversation. GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL
Three chapters about body obsession and Hungarian warfare. Visually striking and gross.
THE QUIET ONES
Attempts to be a homage to classic horror films. Pays homage to all the crap ones.
A revenge film that loses momentum a little too quickly. Coincides with the removal of the beard.
BASTARDS (Les Salauds)
Angsty moody film-noir about sex and not being a very good detective.
Poorly paced. Short Scenes. Good idea. Badly executed. No character development. Long. Faux edgy. Not good. Poorly edited.
Spike Jonze proves he can make wonderfully twee films without Charlie’s help. Lovely colours.
THE LEGO MOVIE
A “stupid” film full of product placement.
CRYSTAL FAIRY & THE MAGICAL CACTUS
An uncomfortable film about stereotypical characters traveling Chile and stealing a cactus.
DALLAS BUYERS CLUB
Brilliantly acted film about a man learning to appreciate life and drugs a little bit more.
THE BOOK THEIF
A comfortable adaptation of being a child in Nazi Germany. Lack of emotion and good accents.
A film about very little, where not a lot happens, but the nothing happens in a beautiful and discomforting way.
David Lynch pours a lot of surreal ideas into this film, and over 3 hours fails to explain any of them.
INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS
A humorously melancholy folk story which is beautifully written, acted, with just the right amount of cat.
Nick Cave wrote a western that feels like a film written by someone who would release an album called Murder Ballads.
ROBOT & FRANK
A film about age and memory held together by an excellent bit of emotive acting, and Frank.
Bill Murray goes on a pink themed road trip of his ex girlfriends. Finds out very little. 9/10
THE WOLF OF WALL STREET
Stupid people doing stupid things for 3 hours. Annoying and fun.
THE DOOM GENERATION
Right from the decapitated talking head vomiting, it just gets thicker and thicker.
Effectively portrays two different ways of kids dealing with child abuse. JGL is creepily good. 8/10
An almost playlike but startling look at the 1981 irish hunger strike. 10/10
12 YEARS A SALVE
The realisation of what happens in the film only really kicks in at the end – But when it does it’s brutal. 10/10
An excellent romcom wrapped up in a smart storyline about something. 8/10
An odd and compelling movie that should of focussed more on computer chess.
Strange man looking after a dinosaur baby. A woman sings in a radiator. His head gets turned into an eraser.
Lots of shouting and wavy emotions support a decent thriller. America has a bigger boat than you.
Alfonso Cuarón is in his element with plenty of distraction-less space to make a beautifully sounding and looking repetitive space adventure.
A confusing and beautifully shot film of people ultimately becoming orchids via pigs .
An extended montage of footage from every view of Sennas life. Gripping.
RACHEL GETTING MARRIED
When it’s not pretending to be a wedding video it’s a decent family drama, but with too many characters and not enough comical drunk uncles.
Engaging in equal parts of hilarity and twistedness. Felt a bit dirty recommending it to people.
FROM UP ON POPPY HILL
A Norfolk-esque coming of age tale about the fall out of the korean war, but looks and sound great.
BERBERIAN SOUND STUDIO
Doesn’t quite hold the atmosphere in the last third but otherwise excellent. Helps if you don’t understand Italian….I guess.
ITS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY
An intense animation about a persons brain falling apart.
’25’ events played by ageing brothers as a sign of who is the better brother but ultimately showing the bonds between all members of a family – minus the sisters. Theres no sisters. Or daughters. I think. I didn’t watch very closely. 7/10
THE SMURFS 2
“It’s just one of the best films ever isn’t it” – Anonymous
10/10 – “Anonymous”
Questioning whether 2 best male friends can have sex, for a laugh. Obviously. Charming.